⚾ Throwback Thursday: Scorpions Edition

“Baseball is 10% skill, 90% weird rituals.”
—Eli Bannon, Scorpions shortstop (probably while saging his bat)

This week, we're stepping up to the plate with the San Antonio Scorpions—the team that treats the dugout like a sanctuary, the locker room like a war zone, and sunflower seeds like currency.

Between the dirt-smudged gloves, unlucky batting stances, and pre-game chants that sound suspiciously like hexes, the Scorpions' throwbacks are the stuff of dugout legend.

🦂 Scorpion Throwback Highlights:

• The Icy Hot Eye Black Incident:
  Rookie mistake or malicious prank? We’ll never know. All we do know is that Colin Reyes had to play an entire inning squinting like he stared into the sun. Coach still won't name the culprit.

• Sunflower Seed War (Year 2):
  What started as a routine seed spitting contest between Knox Moreno and Beau Macklin escalated into a full-scale locker room battle. Mason Michaels had to call a ceasefire using a bucket of Gatorade and a whistle.

• Lucky Jockstrap Curse:
  A “lucky” jockstrap passed down through three Scorpions players mysteriously vanished before a championship series. They lost. It was never found. Brett Thompson denies involvement. Loudly.

• “Don’t Step on the Foul Line” Ritual:
  Superstition runs deep. Drew Callahan once tackled a teammate for stepping on the foul line during warmups. In his defense: they won that game 10–1.

🧢 Quote of the Week:

“You don’t mess with tradition. Or superstition. Or the lineup. Or my sunflower seed stash.”
—Knox Moreno

⚔️ Next Week on Throwback Thursday:

The rotation returns to the gridiron as we dive into Outlaws Part II: WAG Chaos Edition. Featuring sideline fashion fails, glitter glue injuries, and the moment Dylan Thompson made a defensive coordinator cry. Stay tuned.