🐾 Fun Friday: Mascot Therapy
Because conflict resolution is a contact sport.
What started as a friendly mascot dance-off at the kids’ pregame tailgate devolved into full-scale mascot mayhem. Let’s just say… there was fur flying, feathers flapping, and more pelvic thrusts than anyone asked for.
Crash (Armadillos) accused Tank (Outlaws) of “tailgating his turf.” Frostbite (Falcons) called Scorch (Scorpions) a “budget Charmander.” The crowd was howling, the children were confused, and somewhere in the chaos, Waffles threw up a peace sign and walked away like he was above it all.
So naturally, the WAGs stepped in to mediate.
Nova smudged the circle with patchouli while lecturing on “mascot aura cleansing.” Dylan brought juice boxes and folding chairs like it was a kindergarten conflict circle. Cassidy asked if they needed a feelings chart. And Zoey, bless her chaotic soul, brought a glitter gavel and banged it like she was presiding over a reality TV reunion.
After three rounds of yelling, one interpretive dance-off, and a group trust fall that ended in mild injury, the mascots agreed to a truce… for now.
Crash now flinches when Tank enters a room. Scorch is in a time-out corner. Frostbite has a court-mandated group hug scheduled.
Moral of the story?
Mascots need boundaries. And helmets. And maybe a little therapy.
💬 WAG Wisdom of the Week
“You can’t fix toxic energy with sage alone. Sometimes you need a hockey stick.” — Nova
