Tank the Longhorn: The Horned Menace of Alamo Bank Stadium
You hear the thunder? That’s not a storm—it’s Tank the Longhorn stampeding through your offensive line, your Gatorade table, and probably your last nerve.
Tank isn’t just the Outlaws' mascot—he’s their battle cry in hooves and horns. He first charged onto the field during a losing streak, tackled the waterboy, and got a standing ovation. Since then, he’s been a one-bull demolition crew.
Mayhem Highlights:
Ate 12 hot dogs during warmups. None were his.
Once dragged Mitch Carter across the end zone by his towel. Unprovoked. Beautiful.
Headbutted a foam finger into the upper deck. The crowd cheered.
Relationships:
Dean Smith? Bestie.
Zoey Daniels? Bakes for him.
Brandon Reyes? Pranked Tank once. Regretted it forever.
When Tank isn’t charging refs (allegedly), he’s soaking in the adoration of fans and children who want to ride him like a mechanical bull. Pete says he’s too heavy for that. Pete also says Tank has filed a defamation suit. Jury’s still out.
Flag Count: 17
Snack Incidents: 41
Lifetime Bans from Opposing Fields: 3
#MascotMayhem #TankTrouble #DoNotPetTheMascot